Treasuring Marriage & Family – A Resource Guide

Here is a collection of resources for you to use in the battle we must fight to preserve and protect our marriages and our families.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer writes “Marriage is more than your love for each other. Vastly more. Its meaning is infinitely great. I say that with care. The meaning of marriage is the display of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and His people”

How do we raise kids in a pornified culture? – 8 points on how we can raise our kids in a culture that glorifies pornography, and help teach them that Jesus Christ is the all-satisfying treasure of our lives.

Prayer – a fresh understanding of sub-mission. Sacrificing is not easy—it is work. And prayer is work. Oswald Chambers once said, “We don’t pray for the work; prayer is the work.” Because Jesus loves us, His sacrifices for us are evidenced by His continual intercession on our behalf. And because a husband loves his wife, it should naturally follow that he sacrifice for her with Christ-like intercession.

The Top 10 issues facing marriage and family today – Interesting list from Lifeway researchers.

Teaching your children spiritual truth – Phil Johnson writes a great piece on how we are called to teach our children spiritual truth.

The Duties of Parents by J.C. Ryle – download the free book from J.C. Ryle for the Nook, Kindle, or get the .pdf

Focus on the Family’s Marriage & Relationships website.  Here is a great resource for all things pertaining to your marriage.

Love and Respect – the official website of the best selling book and ministry.

The Generous Husband – I recently stumbled across this blog while researching for this month’s marriage theme.  I encourage you men to bookmark this blog.

The Generous Wife – To go alongside our link from yesterday here is the blog for The Generous Wife. Women should look into bookmarking this site as well.

Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God – What every Christian husband needs to know by CJ Mahaney – Sex is a gift from God to his people. It is to be enjoyed within marriage. This book teaches a husband how to cultivate the intimacy with his wife that God intends for him.

His Heart Trusts in Her – Few influences affect a man’s heart for God more than his wife, for better or for worse. She will either encourage his spiritual devotion to the Lord or she will hinder it. She will either enlarge his passion for God or she will pour cold water on it.

Restoring Your Broken Marriage – Healing after adultery – Anger…fear…despair…guilt…shame…when a marriage is broken by adultery, the core struggles of the heart are revealed. When one spouse has profoundly hurt the other, is it possible for their marriage to be healed?

“I’m going to stop pursuing my husband in the wrong ways” – From a wife who is determined to stop demanding things from her husband and to learn to give him space and allow him to make his own choices without trying to make him choose to give her attention, affection, phone calls, emails, texts, etc…

Love Links – A similar idea to the Daily Treasures posts, this blog features links focused on marriage.

Fearless and Persistent – Why how we pray matters

Learning to Serve the Lord as a married couple – Encouraging blog by Jolene Engle on how to serve God as a married couple.

To Trust… Or Not to Trust? – “I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have heard a heart-broken wife exclaim, “I thought I knew my husband! I just found out that he has been living a total lie our entire married life.”

Date Night Ideas – a collection of links focused on dating your spouse.

False Messages – False Messages is a book which seeks to help women, whether wives or wives-to-be, to understand the purpose and the power of sex and sexuality. It encourages them to put away the false messages they have believed about sex.

Children Desiring God – Ministry resources from the Children’s Desiring God website.

The Life of Christ – a One year look at the life of Christ for 365 days of family devotional time

“You and your spouse are created in the image and likeness of God. Marriage speaks to the world about the Nature of God. Since Satan cannot hurt God, he will hurt you, His image, or your marriage, His reflection. Satan will interfere with your marriage in any way inhumanly possible. If he can’t end the marriage, he will mar it to make it as imperfect a reflection of God as he can entice the two of you to make it.” – Garden of Holiness

When He Starts to Miss you – This will be a time of dying to self.  For believers in Christ-  that is a daily practice God desires all of us to do all throughout every single day.  We lay down our rights, our desires, our dreams, our plans, our lives, our expectations, our goals, our wisdom, everything we have, our future – and we pick up Jesus’ desires, His goals, His dreams, His plans, His wisdom, His power, His holiness, His will and we seek His greatest glory in all things.

The Original Two – Oh how little ones love to interrupt things. It comes from the beginning of life and needing everything and goes until they desire complete independence. When your kids get to an age where they can understand that interrupting conversations is not nice, it is a good time to stop allowing them to interrupt you and your hubby while you are talking. This is something that has really been a positive for both us- the original two and our kids. It gives us the time we need to talk and shows the kids that while we are a family, they are not the center of our world. It also is a great modeling of marriage for when they are married and have kids.

Ten Things About the Power of Words in Marriage – 10 things about how powerfully words can affect your marriage.

Ten Things to Bring Peace into Your Home – There may be no magic formula but there are 10 simply things that you can do to bring peace into your home.

Why God Shouldn’t Be Your Number One Priority – Make Him your all, God in Everything priority.

Are You Willing to Sacrifice Your Isaac? – I believe God tests each of us like this.  He wants us to know – that we don’t put anything or anyone above Christ in our hearts.  God can and does ask us to lay down the things that mean the most to us and the people we love the most.  He wants to see that we will obey and trust Him no matter what He asks us to sacrifice.  He wants to see that we are willing to give up the things in this world that mean the most to us for His sake.

The Truth About Who You Are – Sometimes it’s easy to forget who we are in Christ.  (free printable included).

Three P’s That Can Poison Your Marriage – Pennies, perversion, and pride. Selena and I have experienced each ‘poison’ for sure; there’s no getting around it. In fact, each poison tries to rear its ugly head and we’re often engaged in full blown warfare to keep them at bay.  They are truly poisonous, they will kill your marriage unless addressed with God’s help.

Anger is Scary – What I would like men to understand is that for many women an angry man is a scary thing. Even if he has never hurt her and she does not think he ever will, male anger is still scary for many (most?) women. Most women have had a couple of times when they had good reason to be fearful about what an angry man was going to do, and every woman knows another woman who has been hurt by an angry man.

Who’s Your Real Accountability Partner? – Jesus said that merely looking at a woman with lust is committing adultery. So even if we’ve kept the sin discreetly inside our minds, looked at magazines when nobody’s looking, or erased the porn history on our computers, its adultery by God’s definition – you know, the one that matters.

We Both Like – Take a piece of scratch paper and write down as many things as you can think of that you and your husband have in common.

For Hurting Husbands – I know for me my disrespect and control ran VERY, VERY deep to the core of my understanding of God and myself.  This was actually about my relationship with Christ – not so much about my relationship with my husband.  I would have treated any husband disrespectfully and I would have tried to control any man I was with because my sinful nature was in control all those years, not God’s Spirit.

A Thousand Little Choices – Every day we make choices. It might not feel like it, because we can get so used to life “as is” that we float through it without much thought. Even so, in the mindless moments there are a million tiny choices that we make every day.

Are We Loving Our Spouses the Way God intended? – If I truly understand the depth and beauty of the love of Jesus – the one and ONLY Son of God; who is without sin (2 Corinthians 5:21), to take my place, and endure punishment on a cross that I deserve…if I begin to truly understand this, how can my response be anything other than (1) worship and (2) love for the people in my life. Most importantly, my husband.

God is Still Working – It’s too easy to be our spouse’s biggest critic. It’s too easy to think that he/she is not up to par. It’s too easy to get mad at our spouse for not meeting our expectations. It’s too easy for us to say, “If only my spouse would change ___, my life would be immeasurably better.”

I’m Not Sure He Really Loves Me – “Sin has consequences and God allows us to walk through those consequences on earth. He also allows us to go through pain, suffering, persecution and trials, but that does not diminish his love for each of us! He hurts when we hurt, even when we have brought it on ourselves. Because of Jesus, God already sees us as saints seated with Him, that is not something that happens just in heaven. He already sees us in that way.”

Dying to Self – This is not just some self-help “10 steps to controlling your husband and getting everything you want in your marriage by changing your words and tone of voice.”  My motives MATTER here!  If I am trying to obey God just to get the feelings I want or the response from my husband I want,  I have missed the entire point!

Seven Habits to Maintain When You Are Traveling – “Accountability is the best way to remind yourself that you’re not alone. I have a few people in my life that I trust to ask me the hard questions regarding my behavior. This is because I know I’m not perfect, and I know I will have weak moments.”

Three Simple Ways to Better Yourself and Your Marriage – “You can’t do it all! God made you with limitations on purpose. The sooner you realize this the more freedom you will have and the less stress too. One of Satan’s greatest weapons against us is making us feel like failures. You get frustrated because you can’t get up 2 hours early and go for a jog, lift weights, make a healthy breakfast, then sit down in a quite place read the Bible, journal, and pray until you hear a word from the Lord.”

50 Daily Kindnesses – Some great and very practical ways to love your spouse. Here are a few mentioned:Give an unexpected, romantic kiss. Buy Starbucks. Write a note and put it in their Bible. Let them sleep in. Men, hold the door open for her.Ladies, let him.

Resurrected Marriage – “We learnt the hard way that adultery doesn’t only happen in ‘bad’ marriages. We had what I, and everyone else believed to be a really good marriage: we were the lovey-dovey couple, we went to Church, and we even liked each other! We foolishly thought we didn’t need to set up boundaries because we believed that would never happen to us.”

Choosing Our Counselors Wisely – “We become like those we hang around.  We embrace the philosophies and ideas of those from whom we seek counsel.  Ideas, attitudes, sin, philosophies, priorities – these are ALL contagious!  Let’s choose VERY CAREFULLY what influences God desires us to surround ourselves with.”

Light Bearers – “I read someone’s status update on Facebook the other day and it said something like this,  Facebook has over a billion users.  Where is the church to minister to them? That statement struck me.  I couldn’t help but reflect on how much our culture has changed due to technology.  And being that I have an on-line ministry, of course this status update caused me to ponder my efforts, especially when I feel like I’m not making an impact here is this on-line space.”

Recovery After an Affair – How had it come to this? We had both been raised in church all our lives, we taught Sunday School, sang in the choir, we could quote scriptures, we had the perfect “fake” smiles, yet everything in our lives was falling apart. Our marriage was crumbling right before our very eyes. In the weeks that followed, my husband was filled with sheer panic, anxiety, grief, the what if’s and the why’s. Yet no matter how much pain I caused him, he never once wavered in his stance on marriage….‘til death do us part.

Five Ways to Bond With Your Husband – Many parents make the mistake in having their world revolve around the life of their kids.  The couple’s ‘thing’ to do together is to hang out with their children all the time.  Here’s the danger in this… at some point in their lives their kids will leave the nest, leaving the husband and wife to feel disconnected from one another.  As our kids become adults, their lives won’t revolve around us, nor should it!  If they marry someday they are to leave their family and cleave to their spouse.

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